Monday, June 14, 2010

The Book of Jobs

With people around me unboxing their newly arrived iPad in excitement and anticipation, some posted Youtube of themselves receiving their prized tablet, a husband went to the extent of freezing the iPad in a chocolate slab wtf for his wife.

I've had a chance to see iPad in action in my friends and even tried out its interface. In short it's an iPhone at the size of a tablet. I don't have the $$$ to get myself new tech toys so I went on the web to revisit those jokes about iPad when it was announced.

Ladies please skip the first part.
But even Part 2 may not be tasteful.


iPad like a tampon

Many of the iPad jokes are about feminine hygiene. At first I thought Apple is starting to sell sanitary pad lol! Here are some for you to laugh at:
The iPad: Protecting your data from embarrassing incidents. (kathycacace)

Uncomfortable cramping and bloating? There’s an app for that. (Attagrrrl)

The iPad surfs the Web AND stops the bleeding. (tjakabon)

If I order an iPad, will my boyfriend and I have to worry if it arrives late? (fauxfruit)

If you and your friends all buy one, will they sync up? (andBegorrah)

So will iffy Wi-fi coverage be called iSpotting? (vlvtjones)

The 64-gig iPad will forever be known as the “Heavy Flow” model. (Johnpapa)

Does the Period Tracker app come free? (Lymed)

Mac’s iPad. Say it with me, folks. Maxipad. (TastyBites)

A friend tweeted that, "All this talk about the iPad is giving me iCramps," so I suggested iBuprofen. (

Microsoft’s answer to the iPad is the “Technical Automatic Material Peripheral Onboard Notebook,” or TAMPON. Coming real soon. (franzenjim)

I’m not buying an iPad. Period. (melizeche)

So the iPad has two data plans: Light Flow and Heavy Flow.

I haven’t heard this many period jokes since I was forced to watch “The View” last month. (TwittsMcGee)

I heard that for one week out of every month the iPad will be unresponsive and seem harsh when you touch it.

iPad: a bloody good idea.

But, not until I stumble at this I got another joke!

Steve, I’ma let you finish, but Moses had the greatest tablet announcement of all time. (WewillroastU)

Hey, we have Ten Commandments of (?) written on iPad! But don't tell me Steve Jobs smash his iPad when he got upset ok? Write me the TEN COMMANDMENTS on an iPad rawwrrr!

Steve Jobs dressed as prophet

So, in the Old Testament times, Steve Jobs created the iPad. And he went up the mountain for 40 days and 40 nights and came down with ..... So, instead of The Book of Job, we ended up with The Book of Jobs in our modern Bible!

During the days where we complained about devices falling short of functionality, Apple has heard our cry. So Apple wanted to show, how do do it right, and let us know "I am the BIG FAT APPLE!"

Steve Job led us to a new era of technology like we've never experienced before! Apple, with a mighty hand, separated the sea where everybody can't seem to get through with existing ideas. Right here right now, we're in the Promised Land where information flows like milk and honey.

Next up is iPhone 4! Can't wait to see its functionality.

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